The Airport? That's where my relatives live.

Yeah, when I was five years old, I used to think that my cousins lived at the airport. Cuz every time they came to visit, that's where we'd pick them up. And whenever they were going home, that's where we'd drop them off. So that's where I thought they lived.

Magic Garden

Speaking of 1970s childrens' television programming, remember these chicks? They seem to have aged rather nicely. Too bad you didn't get to grow up with these babes if you weren't in the NYC area. "See ya, see ya! We hope you had a good good time. Oh yeah!!" You see, marijuana and children do mix! Turns out they still do appearances every now and then, at places like my alma mater, and various performing arts centers.

Picture Pages, Picture Pages, Time to Get Your Picture Pages...

Time to get your crayons and a pencil! Picture pages, picture pages...

Are you the kind of person who clicks on SNOOZE whenever your To Do list alerts you to something to which you gotta attend? I was looking through my Palm Pilot today, when I realized that I'd been meaning to get my mommy to get me that Picture Pages book so I could follow along with Bill Cosby and Mortimer Ichabod Marker while watching Captain Kangaroo.

I know I've been hitting snooze on this item for the past 23 years, but I'm dying to get my hands on that Ichabod marker that makes that funny sound when you draw with it. I wonder if it's too late. How cool would it be to have one of those markers at work???

Here's a little site devoted to the show.

Where will all the pinoys work?

If these forecasts are accurate, will the Philippines still be able to export its labor force? http://www.wired.com/news/avantgo/story/0,2278,65408-,00.html for further reference: http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/10.06/philippines.html

Stupid Mexican [Government]

If the Mexican government had any brains, they'd put their money into creating a country in which its citizens would want to stay. You know, education, infrastructure, job creation... stuff like that. But instructional comic books that give tips on how to enter illegally into the USA? Despite popular opinion, I really didn't think Mexicans could be that dumb. Maybe I was wrong.

The Adventures of Roundeye, Volume II

My friends' parents freaked when they found out that they'd be going to the Philippines for our wedding. They asked, "Um, why are you going to the Philippines? Don't you watch the news? You might get kidnapped!"

Once we got to the Philippines, one of the first things I did was send their parents Photoshopped pictures of my friends getting kidnapped.

Comic Relief:

Before Comic:

Original Image:

Fishing Surgeons

When I was a kid, fishing with my dad, people were always amazed at my dad's technique for tying knots on his fish hooks. Nowhere else had anyone seen knots like that on a fishing line. It wasn't until recently that I found out. My aunt tells me that for a few years before I was born, my father had been a surgeon. Tying up surgical-grade sutures was a regular part of that job. I guess that with the frivolous nature of malpractice cases, he got tired of paying those exorbitant insurance premiums.

If I believed in reincarnation...

Speaking of suicide... if I really believed in reincarnation, I would have killed myself by now. It would probably be easiest way for me to start my career all over again.

I'm thirty, married, and living in the ghetto. When I was growing up, the last place I ever thought I'd be living was in the ghetto. But I'll tell ya one thing: one good thing about being broke is that I know my wife didn't marry me for my money. Interestingly, we've set ourselves the goal of making our first million within the next two years. First million what? Pesos? no problem. I'll let you know how that goes.

SUICIDE

I'm not suicidal, but if I were, I'd have to do it in style. Overdosing, asphyxiation, and hanging are so 20th century. And slicing my wrists open is not quite my cup of tea. In the 21st century, it's gotta be about shock and awe. If I really had to off myself, I'd douse myself in gasoline, jump off an airplane on a moonless night, and strike up a Zippo... Over Central Park, or maybe even the Grand Canyon. Yeah, the Grand Canyon, that would be so cool!!!

Not My Thoughts

I have no control of the thoughts in my head. I write these words down as I lay in my bed. Though I write every line, These thoughts are not mine. I guess they'll live on long after I'm dead.

Who wants to marry Carrie?

There once was a girl named Carrie
In search of the RIGHT guy to marry.
To help find the RIGHT guys,
Her mom got her new eyes.
But the guys found her wedding plans scary.